was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize