It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize