How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
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