What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Im part way to drunk.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
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