I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize
