Christians are straight up FREAKS
belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize