I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
then he tried to convert me to islam
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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