Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
