The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
