Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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