Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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