Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize
