like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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