did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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