I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
