I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Pants are for mortals
wow bdsm is so cute
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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