I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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