I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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