There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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