im about as happy as oj after his trial
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
