This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
All the doctor said was why
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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