do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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