omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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