I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Randomize
