DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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