You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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