Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
