Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
