so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
