i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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