don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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