Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
