throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
