Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
