its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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