so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
