is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
