I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
