Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
