i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
