So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
