All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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