If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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