so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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