a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
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