Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
please come you make the beer taste better
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Randomize
