Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
