Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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