So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
