I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
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